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Family30 – 3 – Blessings for Blended, Mended, and Extended Families
Welcome – Chris Fluitt | Redemption Church Plano
Family 30
- Families are important.
- We need to get back to God’s design.
- Words matter.
- Speak life and not death
According to scripture…
Marriage is a blessing.
Children are a blessing.
…but sometimes life gets complicated.
Divorce happens
Separation… Death…
Difficulty and pain, but God’s promise still remains true.
Blessings for Blended, Mended, & Extended Families.
No matter what … God has blessing for you.
Blessing for you kids…
Future relationships…
Blessing as you heal from past hurt.
Blended Families
In Genesis 1 marriage shows up and it is “very good!”
But in Genesis 3 other things show up…
Lying
Guilt
Blame
Shame
Sin & death
Very good, blessed marriages are always damaged by bad behavior. It is important that we follow God as a family.
Some of this breakage causes what we call blended families.
When two come together in marriage but bring children from previous marriages…
The Brady Bunch!
There are blended families in the Bible.
Blended Families
Death
Polygamy (God was never for polygamy)
Adoption
Jesus was raised in a blended family.
Jesus had a mother named Mary.
Jesus had a father named God.
But Jesus also had an earthly father. Joseph treated Jesus as his own son.
Joseph is a man of great character in Scripture.
Matthew 1:18-19
18 This is how the birth of Jesus the Messiah came about: His mother Mary was pledged to be married to Joseph, but before they came together, she was found to be pregnant through the Holy Spirit. 19 Because Joseph her husband was faithful to the law, and yet did not want to expose her to public disgrace, he had in mind to divorce her quietly.
Joseph and Mary are pledged to be married… But Mary becomes pregnant! The son is not Joseph’s.
V-19 Joseph was faithful to the law. The law and culture of the day made it traditional for the woman to be put to public shame. …Often to be executed by stoning.
Joseph was faithful to law, but He chose grace and was going to divorce her quietly to save her shame and death.
Joseph was unusual. He covered someone he thought was unfaithful with mercy and love.
Love covers!
20 But after he had considered this, an angel of the Lord appeared to him
in a dream and said, “Joseph son of David, do not be afraid to take Mary home as your wife, because what is conceived in her is from the Holy Spirit. 21 She will give birth to a son, and you are to give him the name Jesus, because he will save his people from their sins.”
Joseph made his blended family work
1 Honor and respect for his family
He honored Mary even when he was not sure…
2 Follows God
He had a dream and trusted God!
DOES NOT ARGUE! OBEYS!
Can you do that? Can God speak to you in His word… a message… a dream… and you obey?
Do it God’s way!
3 Sacrifices for others.
Laid down his rep – Faced ridicule.
Laid down his plan –
Receives dream to go to Egypt.
Leaves home, carpenter business… trusts
God’s plan.
Names the son Jesus. Culture named the
first son after the father… but God’s plan
was different.
Blended families are not easy.
Friction and dis-ease – requires sacrifice.
4 Patience in the process
Joseph waits to consummate the marriage.
Joseph waits to return from Egypt.
You must have patience.
Blended parenting – “You’re not my dad…”
Adoption Surprise
This is a picture of a step daughter serving her step father with adoption papers…
I want to take your name.
I want you to be my dad.
Not just blended… but family.
5 Great outcomes are possible
It is not a coincidence that Jesus became a carpenter.
The greatest man in Jesus’ life, Joseph, was a carpenter and taught him the skill.
God has blessings for blended families.
Mended Families
We live in a time where divorce is too frequent.
Divorce is painful and leaves behind wreckage.
-Children
-Emotions
-Finances
Remarriage after divorce has less chance of succeeding statistically.
Divorce
Divorce is a biblical term, but it was not God’s original design for the family.
The lying, shame, guilt, and blame of Genesis 3 brings about divorce.
There is no marriage upgrade…
Do not divorce so you can find someone better. This is foolish.
BECOME SOMEONE BETTER!
Stay together!
God can mend your family.
You can work through problems TOGETHER.
You can grow in love TOGETHER.
You can raise kids TOGETHER.
Stop being divided. Be reunited.
Matthew 12:25 …every city or household divided against itself will not stand.
Pray together – Altar and home
Worship together – Church and home
Serve together – Dream team (Nolans)
God can bless your mended family.
Extended Family
It is God’s design that families extend.
When you get married, you start a new family.
Genesis 2:24 That is why a man leaves his father and mother and is united to his wife, and they become one flesh.
You leave your mother and father and become united to form a new family.
Your mother and father… your sister and brothers… aunts uncles and cousins… are your extended family.
Extended families are important.
Grandparents can add a lot of value to your children.
No one celebrates your kids like a grandparent.
We must learn to get a long with our father and mother in law. We must learn to love our extended family.
It is God’s design that families extend.
1 John 3:1 See what great love the Father has lavished on us, that we should be called children of God! And that is what we are!
God has extended the invitation to be a part of His family.
We are His children.
In the ancient world when a man would gain a family, they would add on (extend) to their father’s house.
Jesus references this…
John 14:2-6 My Father’s house has many rooms; if that were not so, would I have told you that I am going there to prepare a place for you? 3 And if I go and prepare a place for you, I will come back and take you to be with me that you also may be where I am. 4 You know the way to the place where I am going.”
This is a reference to Heaven.
There is room for you.
When you become a part of God’s family, there is an add on for you to live in the Father’s house.
God believes in the extended family.
God wants us to extend our families to include others.
James 1:27 Religion that God our Father accepts as pure and faultless is this: to look after orphans and widows in their distress and to keep oneself from being polluted by the world.
Orphans and Widows
God wants us to reach out to others in their distress.
Foster and adoption
The Church of Jesus Christ could fix the crisis of over run foster care system.
The orphan and the widow represent those in society who are in great need and in danger of going without.
Who are the people around you that are in great need? Could you extend to them?
Could we extend to those who…
DO NOT LOOK LIKE US…?
TALK LIKE US…?
THINK LIKE US…?
Redemption will we extend our family to include others?
Blessings for Blended, Mended, & Extended Families.
There is a blessing for your family.
No matter what…
you have experienced in the past…
you are facing in the present…
what may come in the future.
Make your move
1 Be like Joseph.
-Honor others, follow God, sacrifice, patience
-We probably need to pray about this. (Repent)
2 Be an undivided family
-A divided household will fall
-be unified in your love for God and each other.
-Be unified in your mission
3 Extend your family
-Who does God want you to reach with your family?